Commentary by H.G. Listiak

Monday 11/17/2003

Welcome to my world. I don't know about you, but over the past few years just about everyone I run into is either getting in or out of marriage, or back in and back out of the vows. I mean we've got 'em changing partners like team wrestling, or square dancing. Hell, you can't even hold down a good job anymore without risking divorce court, hoping you won't have to cut the family pet in half. The latest homewrecker is the workplace, where so many Americans spend most of their weekday waking hours. Several studies have been made ranging from Sweden to England to the U.S., basically agreeing that the workplace can be hazardous to your marital health. And it's not about heating up the pants with hotty co-workers, it's about the general environment at the shop or office. A 7 year study of 1500 workplaces involving 37,000 employees, shows that if a person works with 100% of opposite sex co-workers, there is a 70% chance of divorce. If they work with 100% of same sex single co-workers, the risk is 60%, and if 25% of your opposite sex co-workers are recently divorced, you have a 31% chance of splitting the sheet. Divorce seems to be contagious, like measels, according to a separate study. None of these figures take into consideration office affairs or even lunchtime friendships. The only figure that actually promotes a healthy marriage is the one concerning working in the same office with your spouse. Many companies don't allow it, but these couples have 50% fewer divorces than the rest. So guys, if things are getting a little tense around the house, and the flowers aren't working, don't be bashful, ask her for a job. It just might save the marriage and keep you from losing the new bass boat, as I see it ... I'm H.G. Listiak.