HGs World Commentary
Commentary by H.G. Listiak
Phantom Faxster - Only In America

Tuesday 08/12/2003

Welcome to my world, where I normally refrain from using other people's material, but this was just too good to resist. It came by fax, not by my normal e-mail, with the sender anonymous. It came in 3 parts, I'll give you 2 today and save the 3rd one for later.

The first part was entitled Only In America ... is there handicapped parking in front of a skating rink. Only In America do drug stores make the sick walk to the back of the store for prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only In America do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters. Only In America do we leave expensive cars in the driveway and stack junk in the garage. Only In America do we use answering machines to screen calls we didn't want in the first place. Only In America do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. And Only in America do we have drive up ATMs with Braille lettering.

Part two of the fax asks the questions ever wonder??

Ever wonder why the sun lightens your hair but darkens our skin, why you don't ever see the headline, psychic wins lottery, why abbreviated is such a long word, why doctors call it practice, or why it is to stop windows 98 or X.P you have to click on start? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dish washing liquid made with real lemons? Why the man who invests your money is a broker, or why is the slowest traffic rush hour? Why Noah didn't swat the two mosquitoes or why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know the indestructible black box in airplanes. Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff? You ever wonder why sheep don't shrink in the rain or if flying is safe, why they call the airport a terminal or when dog food is new and better tasting, who tests it??

As I said I don't have a senders name but thanks who ever you are…I'll see you in therapy…as I see it I'm H.G. Listiak.

Copyright 2000-2014 - H.G. Listiak - All rights reserved.